As I look back on my journey in this mystery of life, it’s amazing that I caused my loved ones and myself so much grief simply by my arrogance and pride. In hindsight, I can see at every junction in my life where I chose to be stubborn and selfish. But Christ was standing patiently beside me, waiting for the plea that would prove to be the way out of the addictions that had enslaved my body and mind.

I introduced myself to Christ as a young boy. But being immature and without a proper understanding of who He was, I only had hazy ideas about God, heaven and life. In my tumultuous teenage years, like so many others I sought acceptance from my peers through destructive means and fell into the seemingly harmless lure of marijuana. It wasn’t harmless for long, and my work and school performance suffered greatly. I fell into a dismal spiral of drug use, and criminal activity was birthed to obtain the finances necessary to supply my needs. I hit rock bottom, even stealing from my loved ones, family and friends with no thoughts of anyone other than myself. I was the epitome of pride, and pride is disgustingly ugly.

After repeated incarcerations and the total failure of my will power, I was hopeless. Sitting on my bunk one night in jail, I became aware of something I’d never realized before. This was too much for me! I couldn’t do it on my own! Although I’d done the whole Alcoholics Anonymous thing, it was very impersonal to me with its vague description of a “higher power.” So my thoughts returned to the God of the Bible, the One I had met briefly during my childhood. I came face to face with life’s ultimate question — Is Jesus Christ really the only way to heaven? The question frightened me. I called my dad and asked him, and his answer was a resounding “YES!” At that moment clarity entered my heart, and I knew he had spoken the truth.

That night I offered myself to Jesus, and we entered into a wonderful relationship — a relationship that is constantly fulfilling and wildly amazing. So am I now perfect? No. Do I still screw up? Yes. But I’m learning that God is my Creator, Friend and Father. I lean upon Him and seek His guidance, and He helps me figure it out along the way. As I gradually focus more of my energy and thoughts on Him, the things I hate about myself are falling away.

God led me to The Rock Church, where I felt accepted instantly — where the focus isn’t so much on the outward, but on the inward life. God has also reunited our family there. My dad (who continually prayed for me during my dark times) and my sister (who began seeking God after seeing His change in me) and I attend The Rock together, and much healing has resulted. God continues to bless me and has given me the wonderful gift of a loving wife and an amazing daughter. I look forward to the future with high hopes, and I now see each day as the blessing of a clean slate and a chance to make a difference in this world.